Growth over Comfort | Nerd Fitness

Stephen Wilson younger was a scientist working for Mars, Inc. (Yes, the caramel company).

One day, his boss pulled him into an office and said something that changed his life:

“Stephen, is about to be promoted.”

Normally a reason for celebration, this meant as a warning from his boss.

In a previous life, Stephen was a guitarist in a small Indie Rock band. He also spent his evenings writing songs.

His boss knew that Stephen was a good singer and where he really belonged.

Told Stephen about the golden handcuffs:

“You are on the line for a promotion and they are groomed for the next level.

And you’re a bit at a crossroads.

Because if you get [the promotion]As I got it 30 years ago, your dreams to be a singer will leave. This will consume every piece of you.

Right now you can write songs and do this job, but 6 months from now I’m not sure you will be able to do so. So I want to give you a warning. ”

This tiny voice on Stephen’s head, who had been there for years and years, began to become louder.

6 weeks later, with this inner voice now in a deafening volume, he put the 2 -week notice, which was confused everyone (except his boss and his wife).

He started the tables of bartending and waiting to get the edges take advantage of his boat, trying to get publication deals in music music … while being rejected to not write ​“Bro Country” songs​:

They told him: “You’re writing REAL Songs. We can’t do with it … “

Years later, after some moderate success by writing songs for other musicians, he finally edited the courage and experience and influence to begin recording his own songs.

And last year, he finally put the album debut, Son of daddyWhich Rolling Stone called one of the best albums of 2023.

Recently, Stephen put on a ​Ben E. King’s jaw cover “stand by me”​ I have heard about 10,000 times last month.

(Seriously, watch this video. It will give you geese!).

Golden handcuffs against uncomfortable expansion

From 2008-2010, I also lived a double life.

I had my job at Sixthman, helping to promote and produce floating music festivals. But I also spent the nights and weekends working on a small website helping nerds match.

My boss in April and my mentor Andy (who belonged to the business) knew where my heart was. I was encouraged to chase the unpleasant future by trying to make a gym in my career.

16 years later, we still continue!

In Oliver Burkeman’s ​Four thousand weeks​encourages us to ask a specific question when making decisions in life:

“Where in your life or work you seek comfort when what is needed is a little hassle?”

Wondering ourselves “what would make me happier” will probably lead us to the short, comfortable, safe choice.

Instead, we have to think about what course it will make us grow up as a person or which version will make us shrink every week. Probably, deeply, we know the answer to the question if we have the courage to ask it.

Burkeman’s tips:

“Choose unpleasant enlargement in relation to comfortable reduction whenever you can.”

Yes, sometimes hunting “unpleasant enlargement” does not result in a song agreement or a successful business. I have chosen the unpleasant path and sometimes things do not work. But this is part of the process, and at least removes the possibility of unhealthy regret!

This brings me to today’s mission.

Let’s get comfortable with being uncomfortable

Let’s hunt unpleasant expansion in 2025.

• When the strength train, We force our muscles to feel uncomfortable with lifting heavier and heavier weight – they respond by increasing and adapting.
• If we use food as a treatment mechanism When we are sad or angry or bored, our relationship with food can be uncomfortable.
• When we have unpleasant conversations, We can ultimately deepen our relationships or resist the things that are important to us.

In 2025, let’s ask the question:

Where in your life you live comfortably with comfort and safety, when deep down Do you know that the route of “unpleasant enlargement” is what you really need to grow up and help you get what you really want?

You may not need to stop your work immediately or go to a new target or change …

But it could be worth asking this unpleasant question.

Life is difficult and change is more difficult.

Uncomfortable.

Scary.

Messy.

But if you are willing to say no to comfort, maybe it’s exactly what you need.

-Steve

PS: ​We make a free 5 -day workshop​ For people who want to build new habits that really stick in 2025, it starts in a few days!